First steps to find a wife abroad
Marriage is first of all the consequence of exhibition of love and the sincere desire of the two people to be together. Marriage is based primarily on mutual feelings, whether a Russian woman marries a foreigner, or it is a mono-cultural marriage, it doesn’t matter after all. But there is also the other side of any marriage - material side. Financial issues should not be the last thing to pay attention to, it doesn’t matter if it is a mono-cultural marriage or a Ukrainian lady marries an American. Neglectful attitude to the practical side of conjugal life can bring problems or even be the cause of divorce. There are some particular aspects for the conjugal couples to pay attention to.
First of all, this concerns merging the finances. People are pretty much the same all over the world, and a Ukrainian wife may want to merge all the money into one joint account though her German husband might want to have separate accounts. Both ends of the stick may be suitable for a couple, but people should try different ways of managing their money. For many newlyweds the right choice may be somewhere in the middle, i.e. to have some merged finances as well as having some autonomy money for both of the spouses.
Continuing the idea that everything should be shared in marriage both good and bad, easy and hard, when it comes to debt payment the couple should take it together, not pushing the load on one of the spouses. Often one spouse enters marriage with a lot more debt than the other. Especially this concerns housing mortgages or any other property debts. An Australian man would probably tell his Ukrainian wife that it’s his debt, but Ukrainian and Russian women are used to and taught to share everything in marriage. And it is better to learn about any debts of each other before the marriage and during it just to make it easier for both of the spouses because any financial operations may affect the other.
The other thing to be in control is spending. Often one of the spouses is labelled a ‘spender’ though it’s not accurate. Both men and women spend practically equally but on different things. The possible solution for this situation can be spending in check. Both spouses should try spending money on a tight budget. This will help to find out how much is spent on everyday expenses and how much may be saved for big purchases. So, budgeting is better than saying that one is spender and the other is saver.
Making investments, the spouses should discuss their investment goals and time frames. One of the spouses may be a risk-taker while the other may be quite risk-averse. That’s why it’s better to take as much risk as goals allow. Of course, there are possible variants of taking risks for both people in marriage: each can invest separately, depending on their attitude towards risk-taking.
The other thing that may be of potential danger to marriage is keeping money secrets. Big financial secrets may ruin the family. Many people tend to conceal their financial operations from their spouses for different reasons: not to make them worry, not to be blamed for prodigality, to cover one’s back etc. The most common secret is to lie to the other spouse about the cost of something. It is not a big problem when it goes about little sums of money. But talking about thousands of dollars, money secrets revealed may cause big trouble in the family and finally lead to divorce.
To prevent the marriage from falling apart because of financial problems it’s better to plan for emergencies - anything could happen. To have an emergency savings account will help the family to feel secured, to be on the safe side, it reduces possible stress in emergency situation.
Finances are integral part of any marriage, and on the effectiveness of managing money in a family depends the well-being and success of the marriage.
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